Well, the first thing I advise my clients is to take to heart that overused truism that any of us older than fifteen has heard again and again:YOU ARE YOUR OWN WORST CRITIC.

You'd do well to embroider a sampler, tat a doily, write a song, paint a poster, decorate a cake, write in the sand at the beach--anything to keep that message in your consciousness!

We all have times when things just don't hang together--when our concentration has been challenged by fatigue, bad news from home, or just the wrong kind of food for our dinner. (At times of stress, our impulse is to choose carbohydrates and sweets, when our brains would function better if we ate a simple protein and salad.)

Take comfort from the fact that whatever subject you chose to speak on is undoubtedly more familiar to you than to your audience, and that they did, in fact, learn something worthwhile from you.

Think back to the substance of your talk. Pinpoint particular phrases, words or ideas that you can honestly feel contributed a valuable thought to at least some of your listeners.

If your opening was weak, recall some part of your talk that elicited a giggle, a nod, or rapt attention from a couple of listeners.

Find some nugget of value anywhere in your talk, and focus on that.

If your closing lacked a sense of climax--if it just petered out and ended--do some research and rethinking when you're in the privacy of your own place. Then rewrite in a couple of different ways to build a sense of anticipation for the climax.

Try your best to ascertain if your talk itself needs work, or if the circumstances that particular time accounted for your less-than-marvelous performance. If it's the former, do whatever is necessary to make your speech fulfill your own high standards. If it's the latter, do your utmost to take steps to avoid a repeat situation.

After your speech, when someone from the audience tells you of another talk of yours that they really enjoyed, don't be defensive and assume that this talk fell short. Instead, ask them what it was that they especially enjoyed about that talk. Sometimes the feedback is invaluable.

Promise yourself that you'll profit from this learning experience.

Then let it go, and do something you enjoy.